Wedding gift ideas in the US

Use the registry first

If the couple has a registry, start there. They made it so guests would not have to guess, and buying from it is not unimaginative. Pick something from the middle of the price range, and buy early, since the cheap items go first.

Off-registry gifts work when you know the couple well, or when you pick something that suits any home. A Lodge baking dish, a Chemex or a set of joined photo frames is hard to get wrong. Cash is normal at many weddings, and if the couple asks for money toward a honeymoon, the Airbnb card is a tidy way to give it.

Gifts that last

A wedding gift gets used for decades, so spend on things that age well. The engraved cast iron pan is the one we would buy for a couple who cook: it improves with use and carries their date. The Our Place pan and the Misen knives suit a couple in a small first apartment. The Anniversary Journal gives them a yearly ritual.

For a couple who already live together and have a full kitchen, choose an upgrade instead of a duplicate: a Chemex for slow weekend coffee, good olive oil, a pair of glass candlesticks for the table. One good thing beats three average ones.

Spending, timing and mistakes

For a coworker or distant relative, $50 to $100 is normal. Close friends and family often spend $100 to $200. For something big like the BÉIS suitcase, go in with friends.

Personalised gifts like the journal and the pan are made to order, so allow a few weeks. Send the gift to the couple's home, not the venue, where gifts get lost. Etiquette allows a few months after the wedding, but sooner is kinder to their thank-you list. Choose for how they live: cast iron needs oiling, and knives cannot go in the dishwasher.

Questions people ask

How much should you spend on a wedding gift?

It depends on how close you are. Coworkers and acquaintances usually spend $50 to $100. Close friends and relatives often give $100 to $200 or more. If you are paying for travel to a destination wedding, a smaller gift is fine. Group gifts let you give something bigger, like cookware or a wool blanket, without each person overspending.

Is it rude to buy a wedding gift that is not on the registry?

No, as long as it is useful and fits the couple. Choose things that suit any home: good glassware, a wool blanket, a baking dish or a serving board. Avoid strong decor, large appliances and anything personalised unless you know their taste well. Include a gift receipt so they can exchange it without having to ask you.

When should you send a wedding gift?

Ideally before the wedding or within a month after it. Ship to the couple's home rather than bringing it to the reception, where gifts can get lost or broken. If you bring a card to the venue, keep it slim. Some items here are made to order or on pre-order, so check lead times.

What is a good wedding gift for a couple who already live together?

They likely have the basics, so think upgrades. Swap a tired nonstick pan for an iron one, give a proper chef's knife, or add crystal glasses for the drinks they already make at home. A yearly anniversary journal or a travel gift card for a honeymoon trip also suits couples whose kitchen is already full.